First Trimester has come and gone…

Now that the word is out, I feel like I can also give this blog the Heimlich maneuver and bring it back to life.  It’s been quiet.  I’ve been quiet.  The first trimester was a bit rough here.  Let me take it back to the beginning.

I found out early.  Like really early.  It was May 8th, also my mama’s birthday, and I was about 3 weeks 4 days.  I peed on a stick randomly that Tuesday morning and sort of just for the hell of it.  If your a woman and you are trying for a baby you know that urge to pee on all the sticks is REAL.  So there I was peeing on this pregnancy test and immediately cursed myself for doing it so early.  I was planning on waiting until at least Saturday when Brian and I had plans to go to the Brewers vs Rockies game with our friends.  Honestly, I really didn’t expect to see anything at all.  I set it on the toilet and went to take a shower.  I doubled back within 30 seconds and was in shock when I saw a very solid double line.

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I debated how I was going to tell Brian.  The night before he slept on the floor with our early riser, our little BK, and got very little sleep.  So he was tired and I didn’t think dropping the “Oh hey guess what?! You ready to not sleep again for like the next 2 years” bomb on him was a great idea.  But after the kids were at school and daycare it just sort of came out.  Despite being exhausted, he was ecstatic!

Unlike the other two pregnancies I felt calm about things.  Based on my past, I knew whatever happens will happen and nothing that I do can change that.  Within 30 minutes of peeing on a stick when I was pregnant with Brady I called my acupuncturist to get me in ASAP.  I just felt different with this one.  After all, this is my 6th pregnancy and Brian and I have learned a thing or two about losing babies and heartache.

I sent my OB a message later that afternoon and  I got a response that said I would receive a call within 48 hours.  Perfect I thought, no rush.  Within 45 seconds my phone rang, seriously, it was 45 seconds and it was one of the nurse’s from my OB’s office.  She wanted to schedule blood work and an ultrasound right away.  Against my better judgement I told her I didn’t even think I was 4 weeks yet and wanted to wait but she was pretty adamant.  So we scheduled blood work and would go from there.  They wanted me to go in ASAP so the next day I made the 20 minute drive to my OB and gave some blood to check hcg and progesterone levels.  They put the order in for STAT so we could find out that afternoon.  The first draw came back at hcg of 105 and progesterone at 24.  I went in again Friday morning, a little less than 48 hours later and this time my hcg came back at 277 which was more than double in 48 hours.  They were happy with that.  From there we scheduled my ultrasound based on my LMP.  I will fight every single OB on LMP vs ovulation day. I know my body very well and generally speaking I can always pinpoint within a day of when I ovulate.  So when they scheduled my ultrasound for less than 6 weeks, I was pretty sure we weren’t going to be able to see anything.

Fast forward a week and based on my calculations, I was about 5 weeks 5 days.  Brian was traveling so I found myself trying to calm those butterflies in my stomach on my own and repeating everything is ok, everything happens for a reason, God has this.  She started the ultrasound and after multiple of them in my day, I know what to look for.  Normal looking gestational sac, fetal pole and a flicker.  She did some quick measurements and said the gestational sac was where it should be but there was only the start of a fetal pole and no cardiac activity.  I told her I am a late ovulator and she said, “Well, then I am sure when you come back in a week, we will see a little bit more.”  The fetal pole was too small to even measure at this point.  Afterwards my OB was trying to be hopeful but she kept saying, “We really should see something by now…” I told her I didn’t think I was quite 6 weeks and she replied that next week will be a better indication then.

So there I was…. again.  Leaving the OB office unsure… again.  Having to wait another week to see what was going on inside of my uterus… again.  I went home and calculated my dates… I did it over and over but the difficult part this time around was that I wasn’t charting.  I wasn’t taking my temperature and I wasn’t 100% sure exactly when I ovulated.  I could only guess based on my cycle length and where I have in the past.  I told myself I was 5w 5d that day and when I went back in a week I would be 6w 5d and we should be able to see more.

Fast forward a week… Brian was with me.  I was supposed to leave with the kiddos for Wisconsin later that day and Makenzie was graduating from Kindergarten as well.  I debated not going to my appointment.  What was it going to change anything? I thought about waiting until we got back from Wisconsin which would end up being almost 10 days later.  At that point we would surely see something.  But we went anyway.  I tried to remain calm, collected, talk about other things on the way there.

We got into the u/s room and she said to me, “Let’s hope we see a little more this time around.”  As she begin she said, “Oh good, much bigger.  Great growth.” And then I saw that little flicker of a heartbeat which was measuring 130 bpm.  And you know what, when she measured me, I was measuring 6w 5d, exactly where I thought I was.

The rest of the first trimester has been weirdly normal for me.  With Makenzie and Brady I had first trimester bleeding around 6.5 weeks for no apparent reason.  With this little peanut, nothing.  I’ve just had the normal fatigue and nausea that reared its head around 5.5 weeks.  The nausea started to let up around 10 weeks but the fatigue has stuck with me even now at 15 weeks.  It’s not nearly as bad as it was where I felt like I could sleep just about anywhere every single day and was in bed immediately after I put the kids to sleep at 7:15p.

Our genetic testing was done at 12+ weeks.  It’s the first time I have done in it in my pregnancies but since I am considered “advanced maternal age” it was recommended.  Everything came back low/normal and we are feeling happy about that.  We are looking forward to our 20 week ultrasound when we can confirm if our tiebreaker baby will be a boy or a girl.

Until then I am going to sit back, relax, and really soak in this pregnancy because I am now totally 100% ok with saying this baby will be the last and will complete our family.  ❤

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